so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
It was literally the size of a half eaten tic tac.
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
I thought I walked in on an orgy of smurfs. Man I love shrooms
Our sex bag has now been upgraded to sex luggage, with wheels, and now features a first aid kit. Game. On.
by the time the kitchen caught on fire everyone was too drunk to be alarmed. the host just poured beer on it to put it out. how was yours?
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
Just got biofeeze on my vag. Weirdest sensation everrr. Can't decide if I want to cum or cry
oh I'm washing fake blood out of my bra.
I NEED to hang out with you more
You got me 4 pizzas and i just saw this. I'm too drunk for this shit. I just yelled "4 pizzas holy shit!" At the pizza dude
He's over here like "remember those pics you sent me a couple years ago? Those were hot." And I'm like "remember talking about what we were gonna name our kids a couple months ago? That was hot." Therein lies the disconnect
Fucked him in his sketchy van in the Applebee's parking lot. In other news, my dry spell is over.
The power of my boobs compel you
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
Randomize
