He ate me out and then left in a hurry and shouted "Sorry to dine and dash" as he left my house
you came in and threw goldfish on our blue carpet and screamed SWIM BITCHES and then made me drink a best friends potion with you
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
There was a suspicious looking plate that suggests I may have eaten salad with gravy
I dont even remember coming home... All my stuff is strewn randomly around my apartment... And I woke up at 5 sitting propped up in my bed with just my arm in a shirt
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
What is a foreign vacation of stupidity without some fake names?
You wanna know how bad I feel? I couldn't get out of bed to get the remote, so I just downloaded the comcast app on my phone so I could change the channels
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
Never in my life have I been so excited to nap as I am right now.
I knew it was all downhill from there when the straight vodka I was drinking tasted like water.
Gotta love college... Pregamed for my 8:30 flight home this morning and gave the flight attendants all high fives when I got on the plane. Best ride of my life.
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
Randomize
