yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
i feel like my life is a cheap remake of American Pie
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
I just blurted out "it's pretty tight isn't it"
He walks in. We each have a tiki torch. We say, the tribe has spoken. We put his out and then stab him with it.
A man bought two 40's from me, then asked if I had duct tape. How do people over 50 know about Edward 40hands? It was very weird.
Im gonna take a shit then figure out how to be better at basketball
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
I just try to date guys based on what I need like I am trying to find an electrician now
You gays are geniuses
you just missed a great speech in which i almost coined the term "ass-ian" as in "my vaginal and ass-ian regions are no longer safe"
God please dont post that to facebook.
I accidentally called my professor daddy...and I think he liked it. Help, I'm scared.
She told him that she never wanted to see him again then took his takeout box of bacon cheddar fries and got in the uber saying "for feminism"
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
