Just mADE A PArabola og urine
I don't even know how sober sex starts anymore
we were naked in his bed and he told me all about what a "baller" alexander the great was.
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
i love that youre following in my footsteps.. pissing yourself on your birthday is an honor and a privlege
chimney cleaner pole that expands when button is pushed then pull out. Remember that. We have to patent it.
Who are you high with right now?
Smoked all day yesterday and even more today. Just survived high dinner with mom and sister. Thought I might eat the whole table
Ya I know. She's self aware though, like the terminator. Which is the best kind of crazy
Man...I want to get monumentally fucked tonight.
I find it ironic...the gays are dying to get married & I just want a fucking divorce
You're cock blocking me from my own boyfriend. What kind of shit is that?
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
my mom snuck into my room, washed her clothes and made her breakfast. what the fuck she's a better boyfriend than I am
I passed out while searching "symptoms of narcolepsy"...
oh and i figured out why we kept smelling vomit. ive got vomit on my socks. putting the heater on my feet was not the best of ideas.
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