just checked my call log and realized that we talked for 3 mns. what did i say for that long?
pretty standard. you have fun last night?
apparently....what exactly does 'pretty standard' mean?
typical hot then cold, followed by a death threat.
Did Neil Armstrong say the moon was too far away! NO! He built himself a fucking rocketship is what he did!
well my last 2 orgasms were over shoe sales at macy's. what does that tell you?
Went home with a 29 year old from the bar. Life lesson: 9 year olds stay up late sometimes
My mom's mothers day present consisted of a card, chocolate and the rose bush I threw up in as I was getting in last night. She loved it.
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
Oh yeah forgot to mention that I referred to myself as the oral sex heavyweight champion last night
Sober me does NOT approve of what went on in my pants last night.
Just wrestled a cop. He won my shorts. I won my freedom. In fishnets and army boots. still headed to the party. would appreciate pants, but not necessary.
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
I'm not entirely sure that the guy that just texted me is not on drugs right now. I'm also not entirely sure that he isn't about to be incarcerated.
I DMed the cop that arrested me to come unlock my keys out if my car today
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
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