thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
The brown eye won't let me do that either.
we were dressed as cave people and he kept telling everybody i was so easy a caveman could do it.
Also, just saw a homeless man answer a phone call on a blackberry...
She said her tits were too big, and he slapped her. He said that Jesus didn't appreciate bitches that fish for compliments
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
Currently cooking 3lbs of bacon in case the power goes out bc if even one slice of bacon goes to waste then sandy wins
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
I didn't know where we were going to start fucking, so I just strategically hid condoms all over the house before he came over.
Literally every boy I've dated is now in a somewhat successful band. My vagina has obviously been blessed by the rock gods.
Let's try finding a bar where there aren't people who want to hang me from a tree by my nutsack
I can't believe I forgot to wish you a happy 13 week-iversary of the time you raw-dogged a rando. Only two days late, so it still counts. And since your 14 weeks is coming up, you should know that at 14 weeks your baby can squint, frown, grimace, pee, and possibly suck his/her/their/zir thumb!
Mike fell asleep with his hand down my pants. I'm clearly an enticing person.
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
Randomize
