C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
I'm so glad you managed to take a picture of your foreskin before you broke my camera.
Dude.. I don’t care how hairy she is, you already left me at the bar, and now I have to find another fucking way home... NOW BE A MAN ABOUT IT!
mom just called and i was mid bong hit but i answered anyways coughing and sounding rough she the apologized for waking her little angel up. its 2PM
sorry i couldnt make it to your birthday last night. i admit i chose being a whore over you.
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
You were drunk it couldn't have been that bad
I've never been drunk enough to enjoy getting a blister on my dick.
And you are going to be so turned on by my batman skills later
She's like the sister I never had that I want to bang.
He goes from zero to fucking up in 2.4 drinks. Like the sportscar of bad decision making.
So high that I just walked into class, late, sat down in my desk, and tried to buckle my seatbelt.
I'm eating chicken wings naked and hungover at 10am... Happy bday to me
the girl who hid my weed when the cops came has a birthday coming up. i feel like i should get her something.
Randomize
