It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
My cousin just asked what abortion is. Happy Holidays.
I miss waking up, opening the closet downstairs, and finding you inside passed out.
I just dropped macaroni right down my cleavage. For the sake of our future, I'm really banking on this being a turn on for you.
She kept screaming "best case scenario"
We are going to be Siegfried and Roy for Halloween and you are going to be the tiger.
They drank shots out of my cleavage. Surprisingly, the one who did the best was a gay guy.
I've said it before and I'll say it again: your tits are a danger to gay men everywhere.
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
i passed out twice in the shower, twice on the bathroom floor, once holding the toilet bowl and 8 times moving from the bathroom to my bed. Tequila sucks.
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
I admit it could have gone better but look at it this way, since I broke the urn you don't have to worry about spreading the ashes.
What's the rule for getting in fights with homeless men in suits?
Here's a rule: don't
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
that sounds horrible...
what could possibly go wrong attempting to re-enact the dinosaur capture scene from Jurrasic Park... I have the net gun and camcorder you have the dino costume and can run
Randomize
