hey babe. i'll pick you up in my mom's car. with my mom. she has nothing to do tonight.
My balls are so social today.
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
Um please remind me to tell you what happened tonight. It involves wine, pain killers and firing a handgun in our apartment. Legit might be hiding from the cops this weekend.
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
He tried to tell me that that stripper was his aunt..
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
I just swallowed confetti and motor-boated some guys beard...#happy2015
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
rest in peace liver.
It was nice having you occupy space in my body that could be holding beer n chicken.
that's going in my livers obituary.
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
She said "Im going to hug you" tried to give me a hickey then said her life sucks and started to cry.
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
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