it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
People are handing out olympic condoms downtown, just put it on and it broke, this is how there trying to raise the population. Very sneaky canadian government, very sneaky
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
It's like he's trying to get head in every car except his.
He came inside me, looked me in the eye and said, "Happy Mother's Day"
Aaaand my life has been reduced to whether I can reach to flush my puke down the toilet using my foot. The answer is yes.
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
honestly, i'm just crying in the kitchen naked and eating salsa
You threw up? Were you ladylike while you did it? I'm wagering that you were. Like a Disney princess. Like a "Puke Me Pretty" Barbie.
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
No celebraish? But today's the day that Jesus, Bruce Springsteen, and a flock of bald eagles came down from the heavens in fighter jets with electric guitars and M-16s a blazon, saying "Hey America, fuck the Red Coats, it's time to party"
Apparently I blamed my BAC on the Saint Louis Cardinals...how is that not a valid excuse?!
I'd rather plunge my eyes out than acknowledge being related to either of my brothers
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