At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
I don't know how to tell my mom that I'm not sober enough to drive to the dentist...
you started whispering 'the itsy bitsy spider' while you were putting your hands up my shorts.
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
Okay I can't even be mad, I'm in mid-plot to hook up with Michael Phelp's third cousin.
You've fucked so many I should get a word bank when you make me guess these things.
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
My rule for unemployment is that I can't smoke before noon.
I haven't gotten up before 1 though, so it hasn't really impacted me.
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
Dude there's ten thousand dollars worth of damage to the kids house and three thousand in stolen property and his dog is missing he is pissed
If I give him back his dog do you think he'll invite me to the next party
Well, he pretended he was climbing me like he was a monkey and I was a tree during sex.
Randomize
