I'm surprised I didn't puke tonight
the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
I just realized there's an entire generation of children that will never know Alex Trebek had a mustache... Sad.
I was under the impression that I sent actual words. turns out it was a series of letters and question marks on a side note we still had sex
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
Breathalizer & tazer party did not go as casually as expected.
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
We need to get Harry and Lloyd's tuxedos from Dumb and Dumber. I feel like this is a vital thing that is missing from our lives.
When I go to hand him the blunt and he's eating a cookie and responds with "let me hit this cookie"
Just threw up in a baggy on the airplane. The guys next to me clapped and bought me a jack and coke.
Livin the dream
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
Tinder has really served to stimulate the number of sex related demons summonings.
My Mormon mother just found a butt-plug in our AirBnB closet.
Randomize
