I rubbed one out into an envelope and mailed it to her. Game point, I win.
and then he said "my sister has the same underwear!" please come get me.
while cleaning my room, i've found many wonderful things. one of these is the card you gave me for my eighteenth birthday. it's a christmas card that says "i want to stick it in your sponger"
It's amazing how not interested in talking to him I am since I've decided that he probably has chlamydia.
the chips you spilled whiskey on is not the same thing as Irish breakfast potatoes
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
She yanked on my limp dick and I yelped, to which she slurred something about starting it like a lawn mower
Can we discuss your tits for a sec? That melon patch sprung up over night
I just realized I'm currently not eating carbs, drinking alcohol or having sex. 2014 is off to a horrible start.
do me a favor, I need this weekend off so can you work your magic and blow my boss again?
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
The date did not go well. Turns out I once set her brother on fire.
Literally.... Guy kissing himself in mirror in this hotel elevator
Weird. And pubic lice are now endangered so your hairy balls can rest easy
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
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