Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
you were so high that you made a 14 page PowerPoint on why Santa would beat Peter pan in a fight.
and I must say, you were very persuasive
Just so you know, a true one night stands ends with a 7 minute blow job after eating a sandwich she made for you while the taxi you called for her comes
He panicked, you ducked and I was coming off a 3 day coke binge. It was no one's shining moment.
I have been sober for so long that I miss hangovers... what is happening to this summer?
I mean I drunk but not enough to handle a Scientology convention
Santa was walking around downtown handing out stuff at the bars. He gave me a free eyebrow wax. I think he's trying to tell me something
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
Yeah when we were together he never sent me dick pics like a normal boyfriend. It was always pizzas. That should've been my sign.
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
dude his girlfriend left the meanest shit just marinating in our toilet. I'm gonna have to snap chat this out, theres no other option. prepare yourself
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
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