I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
im like that movie w. ryan reynolds, no ones ever going to date me unless they're forced to marry me.
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
Day 3. Will have to postpone job hunting by a month. May have blown out my knee. Was sunburned on Friday. Now look painted red. Still alive. All worth it.
Woke up this morning in a randoms bed clutching an airplane ticket. God I hope I'm still in the country
Oh my god. My pre-date bowl for nerves tuned into "I'm too high for this date" he kept talking about trucks and I couldn't stop making racial slurs.
What vodka is american?
Skyy. I already looked it up for 4th of july.
I'm thinking about slathering myself with peanut butter and going to the dog park. What's the worst that could happen?
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
Almost ran over girl selling candy bars for charity. Pretty much obligated to buy at that point.
First table when you walk in. Can't miss us. I'm wearing a feather boa and a green hat
You had me at first table
SERIOUSLY WHY DOES EVERYONE INSIST THAT THEY NEED TO SEE MY BOOBS
Because there's a shortage of perfect breasts in this world. You should start charging for viewings.
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
Turns out my mom didn't really want to know I was in a new dimension last night from smoking so much.
On a scale of 1 to 10, with 1 being “good” and 10 being “banging a student’s father”, how bad is it that I’m banging a student’s father?
Randomize
