The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
Please talk me out of ordering the stripper pole for a dollar. Please.
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
He told him to "throw up in my mouth like I'm a baby bird."
He asked me to hum the Ghost Busters theme song as I was going down on him
Chang gave me a 1.5 gallon beer tasting cup, i have a new boyfriend with a huge stick, Members of the Irish Rugby team slapped my ass and cheered for firmness, and a couple of strangers are naming the child after me. Best. Weekend.Ever.
Idk what the interview would be like but I imagine you in a suit and tie surveying a nervous freshman and eventually leading him into a labyrinth of debauchery and clapping him on the back, saying "welcome to the fraternity, son"
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
In my top drawer right now, there are see's chocolates, condoms, weed, and my vibrator. One way or another, this is going to be a good night
I have a hook up buddy in Abiquiu. He lives next to a Chipotle; that's the only reason I see him.
Looking for my adderal, only found acid. What a shame
When you get this divorce finalized we're going to mid evil times AND pirate dining adventure. We're gonna find you a couple of real men and make them joust/swashbuckle for your affection. My treat.
That's it. I'm moving to LA & sitting on his face.
YOUR MANICOTTI IS FULL OF LIES
Sorry i meant to send that to my mom
Randomize
