she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
Sometimes I kiss girls just to make them shut up.
My walk of shame got a new perspective when I walked into his livingroom and found his roommate fucking some chick on the coffee table.
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
Just met me in 10 years...this lady keeps an emergency wine cooler in her bag
Forgot to tell you--the bartender at Crowbar set his arm on fire last night. He was doing this "Cocktail" bartender trick of pouring alcohol that was on fire between glasses. Then some leaked out, onto his arm, and set his arm on fire, then his shirt. Exciting! (And he's ok).
As a general rule of thumb, I don't call until the claw marks have healed.
I wore wrist and ankle weights while we had sex. Does that count as working out?
I threw up this morning to Silent Night playing in background. It was actually quite soothing.
I stopped him mid keg stand to show him how cute my bra was...
THIS IS AN AMERICAN HORROR STORY I CAN'T FIND MY VIBRATOR ANYWHERE WHICH MEANS I LOST IT WHEN I MOVED WHICH MEANS MY POOR VIBRATOR IS OUT THERE IN THE WORLD ALL ALONE RIGHT NOW WHAT AM I GOING TO DO
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
woke up with 4 bruises, 2 hickies and a bad case of rug burn. texans are dangerous.
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