Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
If you are in NYC and not seeing anyone, you should come fucke me now because:1 i am not in love with you anymore, 2 i am drunk enough where i won't feel the n eed to kisx you awardly to avoid your beard, 3we have unfinished business that i wpn't get -assed unyil orgass have been had, 4 i really really want to
sometimes in life you just needs hand puppets
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
just chased whiskey with a pickle. i definitely recommend it
I'm so used to throwing up its no longer a game of hanging over the toilet. Now it's just 'stand up, aim for the toilet, do my thing' then walk out
when i came out to my mom, it was over brunch. i was eating a banana. not exactly my smartest breakfast choice.
Well, she's officially disappointed in me. I have it writing.
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
There's glitter in my speakers, piles of cheezits on the floor, a random Audi in the driveway and a homeless dude napping in a lawn chair in the backyard. Wtf happened last night?
Just watched my entire extended family eat salad out of the bowl i threw up in last night.
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
I only blacked out one night of three if that isn't fucking personal growth idk what is
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
lets face it, we have a liquor cabinet with a designated chocolate shelf
Randomize
