I just spent my lunch hour driving around campus yelling "TRADE LIVES WITH ME!" to all the freshmen moving in
he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
you came in and threw goldfish on our blue carpet and screamed SWIM BITCHES and then made me drink a best friends potion with you
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
The bouncers kicked us out around 3 so we went to the grocery store flasks in hand and asked them to turn up their music...
I'll be listening to "I will always love you" and sobbing uncontrollably all night, care to join?
So the bartender from Applebees totally looks like he would take his clothes off for $40
I like how you possess the gift that turns normal guys into strippers
A black suburban rolled up and a scary suited guy got out the passenger side and opened the door for her as she got in. Then drive off. Who did I just fuck?
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
Tequila, beer, rum, gin, and vodka all mixed in my body last night. The whole "never turn down free booze" is catching up to me. Hungover = understatement of the year.
Sometimes I refuse to go through a door until someone holds it open for me because I'm a fucking lady.
When the bouncer wouldn't let you back in you screamed "Authority is not given you to deny the return of the king!" and ran past him.
i'm now remembering the last part of my nigght....ugh. apperently i bargained with the wendys drive up girl after they closed and got "w/e they had left" for $7
sometimes i just have a bad day n consider lowering my standards
First she snuck beer into the movies and then proceded to give me a handjob in the dark theatre. I think I'm in love
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