i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
I'm at the doctor and the male nurse (haha) asked me if I smoked, drank or did drugs, and when he said 'drugs' he looked me right in the eye and did a perfect wrist rocket.
Then I opened the closet and then i found the babies
How do the people at CVS not know your living in their bathroom?
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
You should be proud. How many people can say they GAVE a stripper an std?
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
I was told I sang Taylor Swift's entire discography in between violent bursts of green vomit before falling asleep in the bath tub
This bar smells like your ball sack. In a weird way I miss you.
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
I just realized that you're going to be drunk for daylight savings time again. Godspeed.
It's a sad day when a deadly hurricane headed your way is less depressing than your relationship status.
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
Randomize
