Be sure to let me know if your relationship crumbles so I can resume hitting on you
i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
All the good ones are taken. All that's left is the Harry Potter geek or the asshole in the corner. I think I'll settle for Harry Potter.
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
that's the nicest way anyone's ever asked me to send them naked pics before...
Peach margaritas. And fuck whatever you're about to say, the girl to guy ratio is like 6:1. I need those odds
Hey, hey, hey, hey. This is a hurriCAN.
I punted my pants across my apt at my roommate last night. Everything else is kinda fuzzy.
Do pleather leggings scream im easy on a first date?
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
i was so proud for not passing out at the same time as usual. i screamed that i had a "new personal best!" then some jackass explained daylight savings.
She pulled out a water gun filled with vodka and called it her weapon of choice tonight. She's fine.
It smells like graded cheese and febreze in the family room what the hell have you been up to???
Randomize
