I wanna bring you to show and tell
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
#1 lesson to be learned from mardi gras this year: lock your car doors or some grimy dude like me might just bang in it and use your backseat as a kleenex
I think I reached optimum potential when I summersaulted straight into a kiddie pool.
No, earlier you attempted Jenga with everyones shoes.
I made him say "i realize i'm cheating on my girlfriend" five times aloud before i would hook up with him. Somehow that has to lessen my bad karma
Side note... I would pay good money to have witnessed the reaction of onlookers as I sprinted down Armtiage with a 15 lb bag of peanuts under my arm
Something bad happened. I'm just giving you some notice. So you can smoke some pot and hide all sharp items in the house.
I'm getting offered Candy Crush lives in return for sex. Like wtf.
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
I just had a sexting conversation using medieval jargon. I think he is a fine suitor.
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
woke with Taco Bell next to me in bed and people's shoe sizes written on my arm.
He came over and fucked me while my conference call was on mute. Working from home is the best.
Randomize
