You're my little dorito
I fell asleep on the toilet again last night...
Her gag reflex was as absent as a father figure must have been in her childhood
Buying $100 worth of beef jerkey sounded like a terrific idea last night.
you scanned your fake to get into the dorm last night and when the lady told you it was the wrong card you looked at her and said this is who i am thursday night
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
I was eating her out when she coughed, I just swallowed a bright red blood clot
I have not carelessly put myself in herpes way since I got a clean bill of health tyvm.
I love you. Thanks for all the blowjobs.
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
He tried to tip me with his police badge...
and you didn't accept WHY?!
Some guys phone started vibrating on the tv. I answered mine. That's how high I am.
He skipped an important family function with his dying father to fuck me. Terrible human, amazing fuck buddy.
Its like he got lessons from Jesus on how to use his tongue. And his dick.
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