Haha I wonder if my burp offended him. So I gave him a fist pump to signify how friendly I am
It was mandatory to shotgun a beer before we were allowed to eat dinner
traded hat for shot of whiskey. lovah yo life. only ADVENTURE NOW. OH GOD IT WENT TO CAPS LOCK
Dude how did you get resin on my keyboard?
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
Look at you go. You're like the Slutty Librarian that Could. They should write children's books about you. Children's books for adults.
end of the world party next friday. virgin sacrifice. tell me you know someone whos still a virgin
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
We didn't mean to put a petting zoo in the elevator.
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
well i don't know if 30 seconds is exactly a good time but at least he bought me breakfast
I've had your balls on my face a bunch of times so the least you could do is buy a girl some dinner.
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
I came home and my mom goes "why are you barefoot and where the hell are your shoes?" and I replied "I have French fries"
Randomize
