i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
By the way, shout wipes are a gift from god for people that throw up on themselves.
he put a lighter in my cleavage and said "you're like another pocket!"
rumor has it I kept asking you to go to the "tall grass" with me...sorry about that.
Lets go see if some hobos will give us a prostate massage for a 40 ounce.
Rule #127: If your going to try fuck a married guy, you gotta be hotter then his wife; diet starts today.
me blowing you awake is the exact turn i want our relationship to take
Everyone here knows my boyfriend as "Half Baked". Life, he's doing it right.
You should probably stop your little brother from ruining thanksgiving. I just caught him trying to stuff a cake in a drawer... And now he's puking.
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
I appear to have wine on my toes. I am really not clear as to how this happened. I'm gonna have a little lie down.
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
Last night was great... In the "I got videotaped making out and getting a handjob on the couch in front of 100 people." kinda way.
why the hell are you crying over taco bell?
I should not have moved in with him. He's got porn stashed everywhere like a homosexual squirrel.
You love porn!
Not in the sugar bowl when I'm making my Mom coffee I don't.
Randomize
