I need to shower the guilt off of my thighs.
I bet he comes in French.
is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
bras are like tupperware for tits, keeps em fresh.
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
She put baby oil on her toes and i am not legally allowed to talk about what happened
He just reenacted his orgasm in front of my roommates....using a squeeze bottle of mayonnaise.
Ah shit... I sleep-ate chocolate pudding again.
This is breast cancer awareness month... The least we can do is give a stripper some singles.
If you ever "miss" working, I'm going to fist you with my hulk hands. BOTH of them.
Dentist appt at 2pm get milk poured on my tits by 2am
A marvelous 12 hours
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
Is that your Nuva ring on the floor? Shit must have gotten crazy
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
Randomize