did you hook up at the wedding?
No but I jerked off on the hotel sheets. I wanted to get my moneys worth.
We were busted for public indecency in the back of my car in the parking lot. This time we were just reading my Cosmo magazine.
We were both halfway out the window trying to give each other high fives over the roof while the dude was going 150.
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
broke the door off of my fridge tryin to have a indoor rodeo
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
Too lazy to make dinner. Had chocolate and scotch instead. Check in with me in a half hour.
Teenager with grandparents staying in their room: is to blue balls, as parent waiting for teen to come home safe: is to sleep. You will live- love mom
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
Ps I took your recycling out, the 9 champagne bottles, vodka bottle, and tequila bottle is how I knew it was yours
If I get back to the house before you, I'm setting up the swing. If you get there before me, it's chains and cuffs.
Some sorority went “Dick or Treating” at a frat house and now the Halloween parties are canceled
Randomize
