what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
We just got home. I got some malt liqour and a lottery ticket so I'm really doing a lot with my life right now
I don't know how God could bestow someone that emotionally confused with such an awesome penis.
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
Hello everyone will one of you please inform me on why I woke up in a cardboard recycle dumpster with no shirt and a stuffed animal? I want to hear this explanation.
Your godly.
dude. i just ate tomato soup with a funnel. we're out of spoon-straws.
FYI, your girlfriend is on her way to the ER. She tried to balance a bottle of jack on her chest. Smashed toes, blood all over patio. Call her, kinda funny though.
What about.....a game of twister and....wait..nevermind. I've hit my cap for sexualizing things today.
I don't know if this whole sobriety thing is going to work out... It's only been 3 days and I want to chug vodka
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
As my straight cousin I need you to answer a question. Are the Astros a baseball team, and if so, are they good? This is flirting related and time-sensitive.
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
I feel like I might be the only person I know who eats bundles of radishes in-between orgasms from their vibrator.
YOUR MANICOTTI IS FULL OF LIES
Sorry i meant to send that to my mom
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
Randomize
