i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
Guys who wear capris make me want to kill endangered species.
I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
the taxi driver actually pulled over to let us moon a house full of people
Dude. Apparently I just smoked some stuff that's used for Nigerian spirit quests.
My life has only gotten better since they built a playground behind the bar
I told him that his face would look perfect between my legs. One of my most successful strategies yet.
oh and speaking of men I've slept with. Ryan lost 1/3 of a testicle zip lining
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
And then you refused to pee in anything but a sink
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
Serious question: does drunken cyber sex with a stranger on omegle count as cheating???
I JUST SENT A TOILET SELFIE TO THE WRONG PERSON.
Randomize
