...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
Im sick of reading dumb tattoos while having sex
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
Screw this I'm going to go talk to her. If you hear sirens they're for me.
looking back it was a good thing we were too wasted to fire up the chainsaw
i think they forgot i was still in the room... she grabbed his balls and said "i feel a fire coming on".
Can you work for me at 4? We might have just taken some drugs we found in the couch and... end of story
I'm gunna send you baby bottles of vodka for those nights when you just give up
Also my face is like def lowkey made of silly putty
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
Turns out the grown up version of seeing your teacher shopping is seeing your therapist is on tinder
They tried to get you to drink water and all you kept shouting was, "NO MORE LIQUIDS OF *ANY* KIND."
I found my parents stash of sex toys. You know my green one? My mom has it...in purple. I HAVE THE SAME VIBRATOR AS MY MOTHER
So. Much. Porn.
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