I think east. Tornado watch. What the fuck are you doing in Texarkana?
Bonnaroo. Tornado watch? Expand on that thought.
Watch for tornadoes.
Currently looking for a new liver on ebay. Struggle.
Theres someone in the car behind me eating corn on the cob & talking on the phone
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
I can count the number of hours she's been sober this weekend on one hand.
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
We need to reprogram your vagina to say "no"
Her vagina felt like a fur coat. It was weird at first but I kinda liked it
For the record, it's NEVER ok to discuss my stripper-related injuries with my fiance.
sorry for the random call. He stopped mid-sex because he wanted confirmation that I was really a reverend.
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
How many times do I have to tell you I'm not bisexual.
.....unless there is alcohol involved
We blew shit up to. With a cannon.
Randomize
