i dont think my boyfriend knows how much of a pain it is to shave my ass
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
"Hung over, tired and having a faint scent of some body butter and random pieces of glitter from a girl named gigi, almost arrested in drug bust, $40 Canadian in my pocket and all i got was this lousy Tshirt" shirts dont exist, but they need to
oh awks just saw the head of medical staff who I punched the bottle of wine at
I'm on my way, but at some point we're going to have to settle who gave who crabs the last time
i had them turn on teen mom at the bar so i wouldnt be tempted to go home and make babies with the guy next to me
We had sex on a lawn chair while fireworks were going off last night. It was unavoidable that I got mosquito bites all over my ass
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
I've spent all afternoon taking and editing selfies. The life of a bimbo is truly tiring.
That moment when a stripper is the one that makes the two of you have to define the status of your relationship...
Why the fuck am I at this dorm meeting? I don't pay $50,000 a year to stay sober.
I gotta stop fucking the bouncers. We are running out of bars to go to.
I am sweating Crown. It all went wrong when the ratio hit 50-50
She asked what the dent on the hood of my car was from..i think she knows we had sex up there
Randomize
