He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
If i ever start ordering tequila again please tackle me to the ground and steal my wallet
Drug-sniffing dog walked past me and my suitcase in the train station. My opinion: they need a new dog
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
I think I'm gonna cut my hair just so I stop waking up with semen in it
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
Its okay. I just know how you can text with your hands cuffed behind you back, so I had no idea what "oh shit" meant.
its so awesome dude, its like im a magical unicorn or something
Left my wallet at the store. Wouldn't have noticed if the joint I just rolled wasn't in it.
They picked up the lamp, held it aloft, and proclaimed apropos of nothing “this is going right up my ass”. LOUDLY
Randomize
