My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
he convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. he slurred every word. i think i found my prince charming.
and by clear my head i mean get drunk and cry myself into oblivion.
You said my dick was impressive. You thank someone when they say that. My momma raised a gentleman.
He insisted he brought his alarm clock everywhere, and then the girl screamed "fuck French people!"
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
we are not taking body shots with the irish cream
So my mom wants to hear about my weekend. How do I make licking cupcake frosting off your face while high not sound like just that?
But I thought it was so funny last night
You also thought you were a gypsy mermaid last night
dont go in the freezer to fetch your weed. my vibrator may or may not be in there. not sayin, just sayin
i think it’s okay to see him. you just can’t wind up with his penis in your mouth again
Randomize