She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
i didn't know you could wash puke off of bras with a dishwasher.
WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
You turned to me, asked if I was having fun yet, and then threw up onto my jeans. Thanks for the awesome first time partying experience
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
We sold so many girl scout cookies when we were little. What went wrong?
It feels like one of my ribs evaporated.
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
I want morning sex. We can incorporate maple syrup into it somehow, it'll be fun
What do you expect from her? Do you remember that creepy man she dated who saturated a pillowcase in his musky cologne and mailed it to her and she still slept with him.
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
You left your hot dogs in my dresser again
If I could I'd magically teleport drugs and alcohol to you. Like a bad decision fairy.
yeah the highlight of my day was the 911 operator telling me they had frantically been trying to figure out where i was
Normal people find beers in their gym bag, right?
Randomize
