fucking a dude
i mean: fucking a, dude
wow, that comma made all the difference there
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
I'm going to take the bottles back.. And maybe get an x-ray
Just got laid for the first time in 3 yrs, 10 mo, 1 wk & 2 days. YESSSS.
My date keeps hitting on your friend. Had no expectations, but not a real confidence booster.
Everything in my purse is 100% saturated in red wine, which made it challenging to cover up my booze breath with franzia soaked gum
whose ass print is on the piano?
He is currently pregaming mini golf. MINI GOLF.
Thanks for letting me rent out your vagina rec room. I don't expect the security deposit back.
Sorry, I didn't know he was with you. The ongoing collapse of Trump has me horny as hell.
My boss walked into my office and gave me a toothbrush and tips for dealing with sex hair. She knows what’s up
A dozen naked frat boys in squirrel masks just ran by. Welcome to the official start of the holidays.
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize
