I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
I now have an ENTIRE drawer of unused disposable silverware from Boston Market... and you guys said I needed to "buy" kitchen stuff
you figure out which one you wanna sleep with, & I'll sleep with the other one. problem solved
hot doctor. gonna get him to touch my tits. 'think i felt a lump' excuse in 3-2-1...
Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.
On the bright side since it was a Tuesday you weren't even in jail for the long! that could've been worse!
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
On my way to get pizza I followed a dog into Salvation Army where I was just hired
I'm pretty sure I imagined the dog... They still hired me
And that kids is the last time I ever try to outdrink Germans
We're at the liquor store. Then going to the hospital
He got up in the middle of the show and returned with this massive ham shank, then offered me some by asking "wanna suckle on my hog." Should I be offended?
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
Don't do it. He's got a dick the size of a baseball bat. You don't want that commitment.
I have to. For the sake of science.
Randomize