But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
i wonder if detective benson from law and order takes those handcuffs home. i bet she does.
I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
Wow, you know I need to stop drinking alone when I pour my drink into my hand and offer it to my dog,
tiger just fucked it up for all of us...she grabbed my phone this morning and started asking questions.
He was a level 5 clinger dude i dont need to be told how ridiculously awesome i am all the time, if so id just hang out with my mom
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
what started as sign language exam pre-drinks to calm the nerves turned into me waving at a deaf woman for 20 minutes
His fuck buddy just got fake tits and wants him to 'come break them in.' I need his life.
I am far too hungover to deal with the fact I can hear you masturbating in the bathroom.
Oh my fucking god how fucking embarrassing never again will I mix drugs at a family barbecue
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
Im part way to drunk.
She sent me a video of herself sitting in the car stone faced listening to the Titanic song on silence. She won't answer my texts.
We already gave up cheese, how are we supposed to give up coke?
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