You know how britney does the hair flip too much in her new videos? Thats me right now
piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
I walked downstairs and there were 50 sorority girls. I wasn't expecting an audience during my walk of shame.
no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
Just tried to chase Captain Morgan with water...this whole drinking alone business is getting harder to do.
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawn mower thinking of you
Please tell me this is my four loko that I just woke up in....
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
I love it. Like, more than my penis at the moment.
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
Drinking Patron always ends with me puking or receiving anal. So make your move when I start ordering it.
My mouth feels like it's at the dentist but my body feels like it's at the strip club.
Lesson learned:nothing good comes from an at home wax kit.
This guy on the tube is sooooooo high. Eyes are bloodshot and he's licking his headphone cords.
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
Randomize