Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
I just fell asleep with a sandwich in my mouth at Cosi..people definitely saw
I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
Now would be a good time to set your alarm to pick me up from jail in the morning.
Ya I guess he's not a bad roommate. I mean if he wasn't here I would probably be more lazy and pee in bottles and stuff.
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
I think "banned from Amtrak due to excessive projectile vomiting" would sum up the evening quite nicely.
He somehow managed to bang-mail me last night. I woke up this morning to a voicemail from 1:54 a.m. of moaning and screaming. I now know how talented he is and how annoying I am to have sex with.
It has been so long since I got any action that I have decided to change my vagina's name from "the chamber of judgement" to "the cave of forgotten dreams".
My Wonder Woman lingerie has been defiled by man. I'm a horrible Amazon.
When you went off to sleep with that guy that looked like a dirty Jesus and I asked why all you had to say "trying to keep Christ in Christmas" and left. The Vatican called, you're going to Hell.
well all i have to say, besides fuck you, is YOU try assembling ikea shelves while high on molly.
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
I have got to stop telling people I was almost a prositute every time I drink
Randomize
