I wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commercials.
I am now the proud owner of a 10-12 year old's Optimus Prime costume from Walmart. Tomorrow is going to be a good day.
it's like a walk of shame rule, you always run into someone who saw you wearing that yesterday
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
I just had a flash of me drinking straight vodka out of a condom...
I'm going to need to borrow your helmet cam for my Wednesday night blackouts.
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
your cat followed me a mile away from your house. if it doesn't come back, i'm sorry, but I needed to get laid tonight.
do you think this outfit says "I maintained my dignity this weekend"?
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
Have fun in Vegas! Be safe, use condoms, and take a pic of Jon beforehand to give out when he goes missing. It will help the police.
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
I'd like to have a moment of silence for all the dicks she's broken off
The man built me a fort. Of course he got laid.
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