OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
Is there a reason "Call me when you're legal" is written on my arm? I'm 22..
I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
the guy in front of me just bought a pound of bacon, a bouquet, and a case of budlight, i want to see THAT makeup sex
I hate the awkward morning-after-I-took-your-virginity conversations.
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
So it sounded like a midget was barfing IN our walls again this morning ...
just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
Yes. I will keep putting the beer into my stomach and eventually the bartender will make a mistake
Pretty sure I just noped a member of the Canadian women's hockey team on Tinder.
you flipped over the sheets and there was my bed. filled with ding dongs.
Would it be creepy if I masturbated with my face in the pillow he slept on last night? Cuz I'm pretty sure that's about to happen
I'm fine. Heading home now...crying. Michael Bolton totally understands me!
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