when we asked you if you had had anything to drink tonight you looked up from the toilet while cupping the water into your hands and said "this.. just this"
I was relieved after I found the unopened condom in my pocket. Then I found the open one in the other pocket..
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
Its a bummer that corporate america doesn't believe in $2 u call its on a Sunday night
and this is why we should make december sharting awareness month.
She said she couldn't find my penis because my arm was in the way. That was my penis
Every man deserves at least one moment like that
Do you remember Kelly my alter personality? She talked like a man and would sing amazing grace?
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
I wonder what chicks would think if they learned that when we add them on fb we email their bikini pics to each other.
He was the only one not on Xanax so he holds the key to what actually happened last night
He woke me up because I was snoring and went for a second round. First time I'm happy that I snore
The good news is I woke up fully clothed, on top of my covers, with a half eaten granola bar. So, breakfast was waiting for me and I’m already dressed and ready to go today.
Do you think in an oreo forest they would have rivers of milk?
Randomize
