omg a stripper jus od'd on stage.
You know your in college when you use the receipt from the liquor store as a bookmark
How do I tell my mom that she just went to the gym with my water bottle filled with vodka...
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
We've only been driving for two hours and I'm already down 3 vicodin...I'm not going to survive this family vacation.
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
There's a 35% chance I'm still residually drunk from last night.
And you say you're not good with numbers...
Waking up to find your mom holding your birth control pills and telling you I suggest you take this
I just called the on campus pharmacy and asked the pharmacist to tell me how each one of my medications will react with "excess alcohol consumption". And I'm not even ashamed...I've reached a new low.
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
fuck you and your stupid hot as hell face
Like I'm getting finger banged and my family is making cookies in the kitchen. Talk about terrifying
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
Accidentally mixed my gin with cold brew coffee instead of cranberry juice. It’s bad. But I’ll finish it. Never leave a fallen soldier.
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