well we can cross tagging a chick in a movie theatre off the list of things to do before we die
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
I don't think he understands what an important role his penis plays in my level of self esteem
if you want blown tonight you're gonna have to take me up on that offer now. in less then 45 minutes you're gonna be blacked out and i'm not doing something i'm not getting credit for in the morning.
Wow. He pulled out his dick and I swear I heard a thud from it hitting the floor.
Oh shit. The hangover. It has taken 20 mins and 5 attempts to tie my shoelaces
Someone broke into my car and stole it then left me $300 to pay for the damages with a lovely note that said "we just couldn't pass up the boxed wine... Sorry about the window."
To the point, I hope I remember where to put my dick when I finally get laid again
You have a 50 50 chance
Okay, tomorrow we'll have a day of life-sorting and plasma-selling.
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
I just had sex with the Sheriff's Deputy. You should call me.
You screamed out "happy birthday Jesus" followed by chugging Bacardi straight out the bottle
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
Randomize
