I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
Just got the American Express annual summary for 2009. The amount of bars we visited last year is impressive.
The lego bong didn't work. Just made us look stupid
You should get with him and swear you have to use lambskin condoms. That'll test his veganism.
I'm hoping he'll tell everyone how great in bed I am. Well, how great in bathroom floor I am.
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
Jordan and I are drunk and barred out at the liquor store sitting in the awesome $70 Corona bench bargaining with the owner for a lower price, all while passing the Belvedere bottle between the two of us. Real life. College has down this.
I'm pretty sure when you walk down Broadway and can pick out people you've slept with.. It might be a problem. I'm leaving for rehab tomorrow.
She's cute, but batshit. Like some kind of dominatrix disney princess.
i just got referred to as "the Loch Ness Cockster". God bless my Scottish heritage.
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
Never in my life did I think i would give a blow job in the bathroom of my old elementary school. Twice.
dude the dog literally grabbed the condom out of the trash can and threw it in the air i'm screaming
No one can explain why there is Dora the Explorer shampoo in my shower...
Randomize
