Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
I cant believe she fell for the mistletoe belt AGAIN.
We still need to grow old, buy a house, and drink 40's while wearing old people sunglasses, staring at the young studs mowing our lawn.
They won't let us do straight shots of 151 since that guy lit his face on fire.
The basket that the Naughty Easter bunny left for you at my house might keep us entertained for a little while...
you were yelling that somebody needed to take your bra off with such enthusiasm my first thought was that you were on fire.
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
151 hangover. Need apocalypse.
Turns out the guy I peed on gave me a ride back to my dorm this morning.
You are a god.
You were just so carefree! People were like, "there's broken glass everywhere" and you were just like, IDGAFFFFFFF
There was a huge crash. I came out of my room to find you sprawled out at the bottom of the stairs in your bra and panties. You looked at me, yelled 'WHAT AM I DOING WITH MY LIFE' and then ran back into his room.
I feel like I just did it with Buster from Arrested Development. Taking a shower. #winefail
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
Oh fuck, I'm officially a cougar..he's got the same name as my grandson
the next morning his mother came in to tell me that she made breakfast. she told me to put my clothes on too. awkward.
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