Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
He offered to take me out to a nice dinner but I told him I would rather he just pay for my beer this weekend
Apparently I grabbed her ponytail and cut it with an exacto knife.
I can pinpoint my loss of innocence as the moment I started masturbating with my teddy bears
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?
I'm trying to seductively eat these M&M's to let her know its on
Grindr hookup awareness: always make sure that you agree to blow one person and they aren't bringing a Friend/boyfriend. Shits weird when you're sober.
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
It took years to build this empire of casual fuckings and not carings.
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
I felt like I was having sex with Joffrey from Game of Thrones. Needless to say how bad it was
I wish I could accurately explain the embarrassment of standing in your bathroom with women's nair on your ass waiting to get in the shower.
got a free grilled cheese. Didn't even have to talk about Jesus
My breath smells like gin and sadness
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