And hes hitting me with his balls, really hard.
If someone cant be won over with guacomole and tequila they are not worth your time.
no... you woke up naked next to the toilet because you said your outfit was too cute to throw up in
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
Her gay brother kept hitting on me and cockblocking me. Don't even begin to tell me how bad your night was.
In a car. Threw up in my mouth. Haven't said a word in 10 minutes.
dude, I'm passing out in the fifth floor janitors closet. Let me know when the rooms opened back up
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
I was so fucked up last night that I peed on his FATHER'S BED and fell asleep there. and yes. his father was asleep in the bed
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
You were laying next to me in bed at 4:30 a.m. I asked if you were drunk and you said you weren't drunk you were buzzed like a bumblebee. Then kept rambling on about having to call out of work.
Bring vodka when you get back from court.
You ever stub your boner? It happened to me. Just know that drugs and strip poker and a hot tub. I'll Regale you with the story over drinks later.
Randomize
