Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
I feel like I should I write an apology note to the frat for falling down stairs, passing out on the couch, and chugging the entire bottle of burnetts at semiforml last weekend. Apparently I was the main topic of discussion at their chapter meeting last night.
Dude someone is playing the piano in the other room while I shit and it's making it really peaceful
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
Somehow she slept thru the vacuuming, people walking in and out, and the sound of constant beer bottles hitting the trash, but when someone said weed in a regular volume of voice she startled awake.
did you dip my ponytail in franzia? its the only thing i can think of to explain my hair right now.
Sat down on an escalator. That hungover.
You screamed "show me a dick stand!" But before I could ask you wft that was you had passed out in the corner
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
i mostly like you because you have a nice nose and that's an important trait to pass on to my future children
I don't remember much, but I remember he called me the dick whisperer, so it must not have been all bad.
Please tell me im imagining that i claimed that i was king of the ducks.
So you just held his hand and he fucking came...?
i think you might have coined the term "slightly awkward pyromania"
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